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Saving money during a divorce

Posted on in Divorce

Even when you and your spouse are reaching an amicable divorce arrangement without the need for outside intervention, the division of assets involves a complex settlement of your joined household that requires legal help to make sure it is shepherded through the system. When you have financial issues with the division that you cannot resolve on your own, it can get even more expensive, because both sides often choose to access lawyers to resolve the issue, and the resulting legal and court fees can mount quickly.

Streamlining divorce costs

There are a variety of ways to make sure you keep your legal costs down during a divorce, but many of them do require the cooperation of both parties to work out. The Huffington Post suggests the following:

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Divorce can take a toll on your physical health, your personal and professional relationships and your finances. The costs, effort and time you put into ending your marriage may seem overwhelming as you deal with the sad, anxious emotions you have about your future. As you manage the anxiety of moving forward without a partner, it is important that you are financially prepared to take on the world on your own. Doing the following will help you build a better foundation to start fresh after the end of a marriage.

Close joint accounts and open your own

This should be your first step when you are financially preparing for divorce. Close all joint accounts and split the money that is left. Open your own accounts in just your name to protect the money you have from a spouse who may be angry or make bad decisions. If you both remain on the account and one decides to clean it out, the other is left with nothing.

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Ending a marriage can have a lasting effect on everyone who loves you. Your parents, children and friends all lose something when you split with your spouse. Your first goal is to protect your children and watch out for your best interests, and divorces can quickly become heated and tense without the right approach. Rather than fight over the little things or deal with bitter, angry feelings during the divorce process, work to limit conflict in the following ways.

Improve communication with your ex

Good communication skills are vital to any transaction or relationship, and clear, concise communication ensures that you get what you need from the divorce. If you can speak to your ex without a confrontation, try to discuss things face to face with a mediator involved rather than rely on text and email. If you feel threatened when you are with your ex, you may need to address your concerns and interests in a direct, well-thought-out email.

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When your marriage ends and you have kids to think about, telling them can be done right or wrong. While you cannot control their reactions, you can make sure that you prepare them as much as possible for what is coming. Most children value stability and consistency, and they want to know that both parents still love them and that they are not at fault for the divorce. How you talk to your kids about divorce depends on their age and where they are developmentally.

0 to 5 years old

Kids who are 0 to 5 years old depend on caregivers for everything but lack the ability to understand their own feelings, anticipate the future or deal with complex events. Preschoolers may start to be a little independent, but cause and effect still eludes them. The world revolves around them, and they often have a hard time distinguishing between fantasy and reality. They are also limited in their ability to talk about their feelings.

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It is difficult to pull the plug and make the final decision to end your marriage. Many couples wonder if it is the right thing to do, how it will affect the children and how they will survive without the emotional and financial support of a spouse. The bottom line is that sometimes divorce is a better option than staying together, and you must both know when to admit that it is time to move on. The following are common signs that your marriage may be in trouble.

1. Everything ends in a fight

Do simple things like finding a movie to watch or deciding which restaurant to eat at end in fights and insults hurled at each other? Fights and arguments are common in marriage and are not by themselves a sign that divorce is on the horizon, but if every simple decision evolves into an argument, you may need to think about the future of your marriage.

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